Radhanath Swami on ‘How to Achieve Self-Confidence?’

35 Achieve self confidence
 

“Actually, to fail is not much of a loss; to lose one’s character and integrity is a major loss to our inner life.” – Radhanath Swami

Self-confidence is a very essential ingredient for success in any field of life. Without such confidence we are afraid to take risks; we also don’t have the courage to explore higher horizons while performing our deeds within this world.

Real self-confidence is not based on our achievements or our successes in this world, but it is based on the realization of who we are, what our purpose is and what we represent to ourselves, to our families and to the world around us.

If a person has such self-confidence, then he can generate confidence and faith in others. Actually, to fail is not much of a loss; to lose one’s character and integrity is a major loss to our inner life.

“A person with proper disposition and attitude is willing to accept even major failures in the eyes of the world in order to preserve the high values that he or she believes in.” – Radhanath Swami

If we’re willing to sell our ideals, our ethics, our character, our integrity, and our very soul for the adoration of this world, then our so-called self-confidence will be built on a foundation of sand. It has no real substance and it can bring us no real fulfillment.

Six Common Indicators of Low Self-esteem

“Low self-esteem really means a lack of real contentment within one’s inner life.” – Radhanath Swami

1. People with low self-esteem like to gossip. Why? Because that’s what gives them pleasure. They do not have any substance inside. On the other hand, people who are actually self-confident speak of their ideals in life and not of the faults of others.

2. A person with low self-esteem is quick to criticize others, whereas a person with some inner fulfillment is respectful to others and is naturally longing to show respect to others, to be caring toward others.

3. A person with low self-esteem is arrogant. He thinks, “I’ve done this, I’ve conquered these nations, I’ve made these millions, and I’ve won these tournaments and so on.” Such people are very eager to try to convince other people of how great they are, how successful they are, and what they have accomplished within this world. But a person with actual self-confidence is humble. Why?
Because he simply doesn’t need to impress people with cheap words of conceit. If you are actually very weak within, you have to brag about whatever great or little things you have done to try to get the approval, the recognition, and the adoration of others. But if you have inner contentment, if you have confidence in yourselves, you don’t need that.

Once a sage in the Himalayas told me that when you do something good and you tell somebody about what you did, by that telling you exhaust most of the credits of what you have done.

4. In the world today we want to take credit for what we have not done and we want to give blame to others for what we have done. This is another quality of a person with low self-esteem. He makes excuses, and blames others for their apparent shortcomings, whereas a person with self-confidence doesn’t make excuses, doesn’t blame others, and takes responsibility for what he has done or what he has not done, and always strives to improve.

5. Persons with low self-esteem are dependent on the appreciation, praise and approval of others, whereas persons with self-confidence are willing to speak what is true and do what is right even if it is very unpopular. Especially for the youth in the world today association is such a powerful influence. Most people smoke cigarettes, drink alcohol or do all illicit things, not simply because they really want to do it, but because they want to look cool and be accepted by the people around them.

But integrity means we understand what is right and we do it—even if people criticize us, even if people make jokes or laugh at us. Eventually, those same people will come to us when they are in trouble because they understand that here is a person with integrity.

6. Those with low self-esteem are easily jealous about other people’s successes. What is jealousy? That means we are so hollow, so empty within, there is so much lack of satisfaction about our worth, our value, and who we are, that we actually have to feel a type of hatred and jealousy towards others who appear to be better.

“A person with real self-confidence is the well-wisher of everyone.
He is not so concerned with his reputation, but is concerned with his character.” – Radhanath Swami

He is not so concerned with what he can get and what he can prove to others by his fashion, by his way of speech, by his way of talk and by the type of furniture he has in his home. He is more concerned with what he is giving to others. Actual self-confidence doesn’t mean we become absorbed in our egoistic self. The art of real self-confidence is to become selfless, because in becoming selfless there is inner fulfillment.

So it is very important to understand that real self-confidence is not simply about what we have achieved and what we have conquered, because that kind of self-confidence doesn’t bring any real inner accomplishment: whatever we do, we always have to have more, more and more. Real self- confidence is when we’re actually finding fulfillment and satisfaction with who we are and what we represent within this world. Some fools may think that, this type of self-confidence, this type of inner peace, is an impediment to making great strides of achievements in this world. However, the opposite is true. The purer our motives, the greater courage and faith we will have to accomplish things way beyond the horizon of even our imagination. When we have such inner self-confidence, anything we pursue is actually easy. It may be difficult mentally, and it may be difficult physically, but when we have the will, the confidence and the faith, that makes anything easy.

– Radhanath Swami

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  • umesh

    Actually, to fail is not much of a loss; to lose one’s character and integrity is a major loss to our inner life.

    Golden statement by Radhanath Swami.

  • Kalpana Kulkarni

    Amazing definition of what is true self confidence. Also persons with low self esteem are jealous, always looking for praise, arrogant, critical of others and gossipers. Absolutely true!

  • Swapnil Gaonkar

    Excellent article by Radhanath swami. very helpful to understand, what is true self confidence.

  • Milind M Churi

    Very very nice article by Radhanath Swami. Radhanath Swami herein tells us that Confidence means we have something to offer to this world.Even if our presentation is filled with flaws,still the world will benefit from it.Thank you very much.

  • Udisha

    Explicit differentiation between self confidence and lower self esteem! Thank you for such clear definitions. To become a perfect self confident person these lessons are required to be imbibed in one’s life.

  • Gokul Sundari Devi Dasi

    Thank you so much HH RADHANATH SWAMI MAHARAJ JI for your wonderful teachings.

  • Sada Nandini

    The art of real self-confidence is to become selfless, because in becoming selfless there is inner fulfillment. Thank you Radhanath Sami for this very wonderful article.

  • Anoop

    The explanation given by Radhanath Swami is really special, as we don’t hear these details and logic on this subject even in seminars on the subject. Very convicing indeed. Thank you for sharing.

  • pranjal

    What an amazing explaination to analyze our own self and boost our self confidence…Thanks Maharaj for enlightening us.

  • Vidya Patham

    Amazing points shared by Radhanath Swami Maharaj. Thank you Maharaj for systematically stating the symptoms of a person with low self esteem and also the root cause and how to overcome practically it.

  • Citra Gopi DD

    So much to take from this article – thank you for sharing this.

  • suresh

    Maharaj rightly said that in order to explore higher horizons one must have self confidence.

  • Kalpana Kulkarni

    Fantastic article on what is real self confidence! Very true that people who are really self confident don not have to show the world their achievements or try to prove something, they are filled with inner peace and contentment.

  • Dr Satpute Satchidanand R

    Self confident myth are nicely systematically dispelled here. Really it is very true that it is inner things than outer show, to be in state of contentment where we feel more complete and confident.

  • anjan

    Thank you swamiji for this nice article on self confidence

  • meghana

    Self-confidence is a very essential ingredient for success in any field of life. Without such confidence .

  • Chandrika

    A thorough, self-explanatory and a profound article. Outstanding!

  • Meenakshi Gupta

    Wonderful article,helps in self analysis.

  • Jagannath Dham Das

    A very well written and systematic article explaining Self confidence and the indicators of low self esteem. Thank you very Radhanath Swami Maharaj !
    Hare Krishna !

  • Vinay Jain

    Real self-confidence is not based on our achievements or our successes in this world, but it is based on the realization of who we are…Thank you Radhanath Swami for revealing such a profound truth to us.

  • Ravi Garg

    Beautiful instructive article…….thanks

  • Shyam Mahtani

    This is a very beautiful article on Self Confidence and how it helps in our spiritual Progress Thank you Swamiji.

  • Paramesvara Dasa

    The techniques to make anything easy is clearly mentioned. All glories to HH Radhanatha Swami Maharaja.

  • SANTPAL GOEL

    Thats very true.People do wrong things so that the society accepts them.

  • pradeep lalwani

    Wonderful explanation for self confidence……………

    thank you for enlightening us

  • govind

    Thank you Maharaj for very wonderfully explaning it. we will get self confidence when we understand who we are.

  • Arjun K Ramachandra

    Quality of self confidence has been beautifully summarized by Radhanah Swami. Real self- confidence is when we’re actually finding fulfillment and satisfaction with who we are and what we represent within this world.

  • Sumit Sharma

    Thanks for sharing it!